…I’m here! Hi everybody! Can’t wait to meet everyone in person now! All 6lbs 13 oz’s of me ❤️

…what does “effaced and dilated mean? Does it have anything to do with all the beeping I’m hearing? And what’s a “effing epidural right now!” Is that good? Did I dream someone yelling that? Ooo, when your belly squeezes me like that I slide down, you do realize that, right?

…what is water, and how does it break?